Chinks of light

 Today, I feel the best I've felt since Mark died. 


I thought it was important to write that down. It's very easy to focus on the negative and gloss over or take for granted the good. Like a consumer quick to complain but slow to compliment. So I'll say it again


Today, I feel the best I've felt since Mark died. 


I have left a couple of wattsapp groups that were not helping me and infact were making me feel worse. My counselor helped me to see that that isn't selfish or passive agressive, but making a stand and setting a boundary, and yes, putting myself first for a change.  It feels good. 


I've had a big blitz in the kitchen and am slowly clearing out the detritus and clutter 20- odd years of living with a hoarder has accumulated. Amazing what I just learned to tolerate over the years. Well. As someone who should know better said to me the day after the funeral "look at this as a new start for you and Oliver"....Today I am.

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