Have you ever felt like your life is an Eastenders storyline? That's where I am right now. On the 29th September 2021, the 10th anniversary of my first born's funeral, my husband passsed away. Fabulous timing my love; way to make a horrible month even harder. So now I find myself 6 weeks in, the funeral is done (which, by the way, I pride myself on being the best I could have done for him) and life, for everyone else, has returned to normal whilst life for Oliver and I will never be the same again. Our lives are shattered. As you will know (or if not, will now have learned) I'm no stranger to grief. I know all too well what to expect and it terrifies me. I'm not allowing myself to go there yet because I have a little boy to look after and I simply cannot fall apart. I know that once I start to cry I won't stop for a very long time. So instead of facing grief head on I'm trying to do what Mark would have done and putting it in a box. Trouble is it keeps lifti...
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